Flat Mars Coverup!


Mars Reconnaissance Observer (MRO) took pictures from orbit of the Phoenix Mars lander, roughly ten years apart. If this animated gif from NASA works correctly, you’ll see a blink comparison of the site ten years ago, and now. The evidence could not be more striking: Little Green Men (LGMs) have been systematically covering our lander with sand! They work slowly but steadily; they’ve even hidden the parachute (bottom). My theory is they’re part of the Flat Mars Society and are covering up evidence of life from off world. How devious.

This, combined with the famous hex-wrench socket on top of Saturn (see in motion here), offer clear proof of aliens meddling in and around our solar system. I suspect they live inside Saturn and go in and out through the hex hatch, but this has not yet been shown. Sciency research continues.

Probing Time!

A colonoscopy without sedation? Not so bad, reports this reporter. Somewhat uncomfortable, yes. But it was pretty interesting to watch on the monitor. And leaving with a clear head? And being able to enjoy a cold one (of whatever kind) later that evening, and not feeling like you’re losing a whole additional day? Yeah, that seems like a good trade-off to me. I’ll probably do the same next time.

Which, sorry to say, will be in just three years. Oh well. I’m healthy.

And now, where’s that pizza?

From the movie Paul:

Organic Farming? Or Alien Produce?

Here at the Star Rigger Ranch, we believe strongly in organic farming, especially if someone else is doing the work. In that spirit, Allysen signed us up for a weekly allotment of organic produce through CSA (Community Supported Agriculture). Every week she brings home twice as much produce as we can eat, which encourages us to give. And some of that produce is some kind of weird.

In keeping with the Thanksgiving Feast theme of today, I present to you:

Alien carrot
The alien carrot (organic)
Alien chard face grabber_sm
The face-sucking alien chard (organic)
Braaaains_sm
Bra-a-a-i-i-ns (organic celeriac)
Alien fractal cauliflower_sm
Alien fractal cauliflower (organic)
Veggies
And some regular veggies (organic), just to keep us off balance.
But we know what they’re up to.
Enjoy your meal!